Hello Again Again
Here’s something I’m learning slowly: when a thing you truly enjoy doing becomes a job, you stop enjoying it as much. Maybe that’s not true for all folks, but I think it might be true for me. Here are some examples:
- Knitting. I’ve signed on to knit two of my family members scarves and while I so enjoy the process, the needles don’t call for me to pick them up like they used to. (I am literally LOLing at that last sentence and imagining these sweet little knitting needles calling me up on the teeniest of phones.) It doesn’t help that I feel pre-arthritic in both hands. I’m doing these exercises to help with the pain. Yes, stress injuries from knitting do happen. I am the tragic proof.
- Pinning. Okay, this is by no means a job (oh that I wish it were). But it is something I haven’t been doing much of lately. With pinning, the inactivity came on slowly. When I first joined last year, I’d pin every day, maybe even multiple times a day. I bordered on the fanatic, as my pinners do. Then I got the app on my smartphone and that took things to a whole new level. I’d wake up and pin, pin during the day, and then pin a bit more at night. Okay, I’ll say it: I was addicted. I would be the perfect candidate for an “I wish I was pinning” bumper sticker. And then, all of a sudden I stopped. Now I’ll go for days without pinning! (I know this might sound ridiculous but such is the state of my life, folks.) What an achievement! And it’s not because I’m trying to hold myself back, either. I’m not weening myself from the pin-drug. No, I’m just not motivated to do it anymore. Okay, that’s partially a lie because I still pin (and when I do, lordy lordy, your feed will blow up with my name), just not with the addiction-type frequency of earlier moons.
- Being alone. I work from home, or the library, but mostly from home. And that means I’m by myself a lot. Like all day. Every work day. So when my housemates or the boyfriend come home I pounce on them like the starved for human-attention being that I am. If someone’s in the house with me, there’s a good chance I’m as physically close that person as I can possibly be. Yes, it’s a little creepy. I recognize that. Before I worked from home, spending time alone was a bit of a treat. I worked with other people, I lived with other people, and so I cherished those little moments spent alone, whether I be zoning out or watching TV, or zoning out while watching TV. It’s not like I don’t ever choose to be alone when I have the option to be around people; I am a wee bit introverted (or maybe it’s just occasional shyness? hrmm) after all. But because I spend so much time by myself, I find my yearning to be near others, even if I’m not talking to them, stronger than ever. Basically, I’m saying that working alone is to blame for my not wanting to be alone.
- Eating eggs. Okay, this one’s a bit out there but hear me out. I like eggs, always have always will. But ever since I started life in the real working post-college world two years ago, I have not been much of an egg fan. I think this is because I associate egg sandwiches (I’m talking fried egg on bread here, not egg salad (which requires too much effort, hello)) with having a job and being too poor to buy sandwich meat (and too lazy after a long day of work to make anything more gourmet). I would also eat fried eggs on spagetti. Basically, if I was in need of protein, I’d put an egg on it (preferably poached). And now I’m sick of them. Every time Eric says, excitedly, that he’s going to make an egg sandwich (fried egg), my gag reflex triggers. I just. can’t. eat. them anymore.
- Blogging. Like pinning, blogging is by no means my job. That said, sometimes I treat it as such. A few months back I attended a couple online classes on blogging and branding, etc. and got really excited about blogging every week and doing giveaways and meeting up with other bloggers and finding more readers, yadda yadda yadda. And while at first I was stoked on the whole thing (hello three posts a week and update emails!), I quickly tired of it. I want blogging to be something I do when I’ve found something cool to share. Okay, and while arguably I find something cool every day and want to share it…I just don’t have the time! I work 4o hrs a week, I watch a lot of TV post-5pm to cope, and I like to spend my weekend lounging around the house or frolicking in the park (mostly the former).
All this is to say that I want to approach these things that I’ve so enjoyed in my life (eggs being a stretch here) from a new perspective. Not as work, but as something I want to give to the world and to myself. Something fun and creative (again, eggs are a stretch) that inspires and motivates me. This might mean frequent absences on the blog, but should result in higher quality posts. Let’s hope anyway!
Have things you’ve loved doing turned into chores too? Please share and tell me I’m not alone (pun not intended)!